Love always wins

This post will be quick and rambling and probably unedited.  I don’t care.  And even though I had no plans to write today, I feel compelled to do so on this very historic day.  But before I praise the decision passed down from SCOTUS, let me back up to the darker days of last week. But before I even do that, I think for my own purposes I need to restate that this particular blog is family focused, as in: focused on my family.  There’s little to no politics, religion, or outspokenness here that does not relate to us, the kids, or our larger circle. This blog is for our family’s posterity. We keep a deliberately small readership for that reason. So, then, last week… Actually, let me back up a touch further:  Elliot’s class has been doing a huge project about the Boston Marathon Bomber and the death penalty. They have been researching, writing, debating, and doing some ethical soul searching. I’m quite impressed with the teacher for tackling this hard, painful, difficult, and topical issue with the kids.  Naturally, Elliot has been talking a lot about it at home, and naturally Meredith is often a silent and attentive bystander of conversations.  Sometimes she will ask questions of her own, but for the most part she just absorbs, which is why I try to carefully curate the conversation with the boy when she’s around. Now then, last week.  The horrific slaughter in Charleston, SC left many, including me, reeling and sickened.  We have been watching with increased frequency violence against blacks, partly I think because of the ubiquitousness of social media and digital cameras. But the latest episode was beyond fathomable to me.  Especially when you compare police handling and media terminology used (e.g. ‘disturbed young man’ if the perpetrator is white. ‘Terrorist’ if he is Arabic or Muslim. ‘Thug’ or ‘gangster’ if he is black).  Elliot, too, was outraged and upset. And he engaged me in conversation trying to find answers where there are none. He wanted to compare and contrast Tsarnaev with Roof. Merrie was overhearing everything, but understanding little.  So when Elliot left the room, she asked what had happened. I answered her thusly:  A 21 year old white man committed a heinous, hateful terrorist act by attending a Bible Study class in an historic black church and then murdering nine members of the group by shooting them in their house of worship while they were at prayer. I expected her to ask why? or how? or did anyone get him? or did anyone survive?  That was not what confused her.  Her first question was:  What do you mean a “black church?”  I was a little thrown but clarified by saying a church where the congregation is made up of predominantly black people. An African Methodist Episcopal church.  She still didn’t understand:  “Why is there only one type of people at that church?”  Why is there only one type of people at that church?  While I stammered an answer about people finding comfort worshipping with people who are familiar and similar, I was filled with a surging beautiful hope:  My daughter is blind to color as a distinguishing quality. She really is. She doesn’t understand prejudice based on skin color as something that exists in this modern era. Not yet, anyway. And how wonderful is that? She has a natural diversity in her world and sees nothing out of the ordinary with people who are different from her. In fact, things only seem weird to her when there isn’t diversity. Which brings us to today and what has me typing when I should be doing a million other things. Today the Supreme Court of the United States made same-sex marriage legal in the whole nation.  My kids will hardly remember a time when it was illegal.  They never understood why it was illegal in some states in the first place, and how wonderful is that?  I am so proud to be an American today, so proud that our country finally made this change.  I am so hopeful for the future of our children. I know that this ruling will make many people angry. I know that people will lash out, commit more acts of hate, and try to undo this progress. They can try, but in the end love always wins. My kids know that love is love.


One thought on “Love always wins

  1. Kim,As usual so poignant and beautifully written – it’s definitely a red letter day. You and Larry are doing such a great job with Elliot and, jan 


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